Worst day of my life

Worst Day Of 'My' Life
There was a guy in a bar, just looking at his drink. He stayed like that for half an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver stepped up next to him, took the drink from the guy, and drank it all down.

The poor man started crying. The truck driver said, “Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't see a man crying.”

“No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I was late getting to my office. My boss was outrageous, and fired me. When I left the building to go to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police say they can do nothing. I got a cab to return home, and when I left it, I remembered I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drove away. When I got home, I found my wife kissing gardener. I left home and came to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison.”

"Dang," said the truck driver. And dropped down on the man, and crushed him.

"Erk. Goodbye, cruel wor-"

Second Worst Day of My Life
Hilary Clinton ran for president.

Third Worst Day of My Life
I found humorpedia, which originally opened into a page about somebody banging their head against a wall. . . Then, after finding the true humorpedia, I realized somebody falling off a cliff was much funnier.

Fourth Worst Day of My Life
I had to go to Home Depot to find my supplies.